Sunday, March 13, 2005

Wake Up Call; Busy Signal

I've been a bit of an insomniac recently. I've been sleeping an acceptable number of hours, but wake up often and can't seem to get RESTFUL sleep.

I took the bus to downtown Los Angeles. It's amazing how much an enormous city, in such a populous city can be so empty. Also, how astonishingly small and lonely it can make you feel. A few years back I used to go downtown on the Metro Rail and take photographs. I wanted to eventually put together a retrospective called 'Entropy and Repetition.' I was (and am) fascinated by the collision between nature and city, and especially the decay of man-made structures. Also, the contrast between the super-wealthy and the destitute was quite compelling. Obviously, I still saw those things today, but I just came back from it with a sense of intense loneliness. Sundays downtown, despite the fact that there was a Clippers game (which undoubtedly brings unfamiliar persons to the desolate downtown area) are nearly devoid of pedestrian traffic. Three-quarters of the shops and restaurants were closed. It's so very mysterious, that I don't know how to put my finger on it. I actually spent most of my time talking on a cell phone in a little corporate-built courtyard between two skyscrapers; a disinfected haven from the mean streets. After only a few hours, I felt it necessary to make my way towards the bus route to get back home.

I hope I'm not hitting a wall of chemical withdrawal here, or perhaps it's just the collusion of dreary March days, abandoned metropolises and lovelorn wonderings.

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